Game Day

It all started around 2:30 yesterday afternoon when I forgot to fake an illness.

Because of my lack of quick thinking I was suckered into risking my life on a bumpy bus ride to Charleston West Virginia… In a snow storm.

Winter Weather Advisory Warning: Driving conditions will be dangerous if not impossible.

Lies.

Coaches left before us to let us know if the roads were doable. Apparently they thought ice skating across 64 was “doable.”

Texting convo-between Captain Red and Coach

Coach: Please let us know when you get on 81

Red : You do know our lives are at serious risk, correct?

Coach: We’re discussing that now.

Personal input- I never knew living was up for discussion.

Ten minutes later

Coach: Where are you now?

Red: Winter Wonderland

This is what I imagined happened next…

Coach: No, seriously?

Red: No, seriously fuck you.

Well, 12 inches of snow and four hours later we arrived at a midpoint in Lexington Virginia. I suppose the bus driver realized riding on the safety bumps for three hours was not only extremely annoying, but unsafe. Good timing, I was starving.

Might as Well be Virgin 2, Red and I managed to get a room together.

Coach said “Don’t make me regret this”

Have a little faith huh?

I suppose she had reason for nerves. Might as Well be Virgin 2 and I have quite the reputations. The two of us use to keep a list of strikes consisting of minor offenses such as cell phone use during study hall or kicking a soccer ball at coach during a water break. The major strikes consisted of plagiarizing in class or getting caught using a fake ID.

When we surpassed one-hundred we purposely lost count.

The team headed straight to Ruby Tuesday’s where I stuffed my face with mini burgers and we discussed how ridiculous Valentine’s Day is. Well, I discussed it and everyone else agreed to disagree.

The only upside to Valentine’s Day is overdosing on chocolates.

I’m so romantic.

Anyways, when we returned to the bus to head to the hotel, our only Black girl on the team stood up and said, “Apparently I belong on the back of the bus.”

No one knew why she said it, but no one was going to tell her differently.

As a quick conversation switcher, one of the assistant coaches brought up that my Jesus jokes weren’t really funny.

I responded “God has a sense of humor coach, that’s why he made you”

Side note- Jesus must have a sense of humor or he would have stayed a Jew… what an idiot.

It was near 11:00pm and the roommates were headed to sleep.  

Me: I’m not tired!

Red: Well, some of us have to play in a game tomorrow.

Ouch.

I woke up to an obnoxious wake-up call and salty hotel eggs. I had a horrible night sleep due to the below freezing temperature in our room and the lack of energy to turn on the heat.

Red: I know I slept bad when I wake up with frizzy hair. Well, I either slept bad or I had great sex.”

Me: Can you not remember which one it was?

Off to Charleston. Game time is at 5:30pm. Heard the bench was getting rowdy.