Sexual Education

Week three of preseason= Done

I’d love to say my six pack of abs is finally shaping up, but I’ve been leaning on pizza for comforting purposes. Blah... over it, eating habits are the least of my worries.

Not sure if it’s my bed or the back extensions, but I’ve been walking around like a 67 year old man for about a week now. Needless to say, I love weekends.

After reminiscing on what felt like the longest week of my life, I concluded that my Wednesday night class (Environmental Education) with PE Teacher and MAWBV2 holds my highlight.

In the process of being certified to teach Project Learning Tree (some environmental nonsense course meant for children grades K-8), I had a revelation.

In order to complete the certification, we were required to participate in a few of the activities, which resulted in our class attempting to become a tree.

Ironically, MAWBV2 was the only one that got lucky… she was the bark (the outer layer for the idiots out there). Her only task was to say “I will protect" aka "I am the condom."

PE Teach and I got stuck posing as the roots and spent the evening on our knees, saying “slurp, slurp.”

Revelation- I’m just now realizing that everything meant for children has some underlying sexual innuendo unnecessarily placed within the movie/ activity/ or book for the sake of an adult laugh.

You sick, sick fucks.